Here I sit... With a Big Cheesy Grin pt. 1

It is Thursday evening. I have been here before, sitting on my couch, Sogna la pooch nearby. Today is different. I am bringing you along my friend for what proves to be an exciting adventure. For the first time, I am going to chronicle thoughts and feelings before the date and immediately after. At this point, I am worn out with online dating. I am on the sites to gain information and stories that I can share with you. Things you can laugh at, learn from, and be forewarned about. Today, the flame of possiblity has flickered ever so slightly. I met this gentleman, as I have many others, online. We met a couple days ago and started sending messages back and forth. I figured this was just part of the ebb and flow of it all, but that is another page of this book! Look out for something called Feast or Famine, or Ebb and Flow, or Turn It All About. Basically, I thought this was just one more thing just like the others. A man who will tell me how beautiful I am and then choose not to talk to me. But, he was different. He didn't pour it on or hold back too much. He showed his interest and indicated that he was interested in talking with me on the phone. I gave my Yahoo chat ID and waited to hear from him. This morning... 7am, I got a message. Yes, me, at 7am when I didn't have to be up until 8! Grace was extended because he knows not what he did!!! I saw that the message was from him, turned off the ringer, and went back to sleep mumbling something like "oh, it's 'C', I'll get back to him later...zzzzz" Later in the day, I sent a message back to him and the chase began. He sent a message on the dating site. When I received it and responded, I found a message on Yahoo. I replied to that and then found he had answered my question on the dating site. The last message included his phone number. Today was an extremely busy day, so I knew I did not have much time to chat, let alone a first-time chat. Before I knew it, I was grading papers with one hand and dialing his number with the other. He answered the greeting with a tentative 'hhhello.' "Hi, this is Jennifer," "Oooooh! Hello, Jennifer!" He sounded relieved. The conversation flowed with such ease and grace from that point on. We made plans to see each other sometime this evening. I figured I'd come home, play with Sogna, change into something sexy and meet up for dinner. As I pulled into my parking lot, the phone rang. My butterflies started dancing as I fumbled for the phone and put on the sexy smooth, 'hello.' About twenty minutes later, we met for coffee at a shop near my house. Being that he arrived before I did, he called and asked if I wanted him or order anything for me. Shocked, "I stammered, um, uh, no.. well, uh, sure! I'll take a small Chai Tea." I arrived and spotted him immediately. Chemistry was instant and electrifying. We smiled, we chatted, we looked, gazed, laughed, shared. We connected on an intellectual level as well as physical - such a turn on! Many commonalities; our upbringing, faith, sense of humor, positive outlook on life, lack of children, goals for the future. We met for a very short time and made plans to connect again tonight for dinner. That brings me to right here, right now. I am sitting here waiting, mostly dressed, hair done, make- up flawless. Inside, I wonder if I will get a call or an excuse. I realize what I have allowed to happen and what it has done to me. I've started to lose my faith in mankind, or rather, kind man. How sad is that?! For a hopeful romantic to be hopeless, that is a sad day my friends. He presented himself as being extremely interested in getting to know me. I believe he will call, but what if he doesn't? Do I call? Do I text? Does that come across as desperate? Do I give him a second chance as I have every other guy I've been interested in? Why am I betting that he won't follow through? I think I will text... something smooth like, "so, what are you thoughts about tonight?" This is what happens in the mind of a communication person. I think, and think, and ask a girl friend, and wonder, ultimately driving myself crazy one way or another! My phone, like yours, often does not get a clear signal, so I keep checking it. Like they used to in the old movies. The teenager in love would run to the phone and pick up the receiver just to make sure the dial tone was there.. and that her little sister wasn't tying up the phone line. Nope, it still works, and no call yet. I changed his ring tone so I won't have to wonder if it is him calling - I'll know. I know I should leave it alone and wait to see what happens. Should I? What would you do? Call, text, nothing? Damn, I wish I could hear your answer!